A Rangeriffic Thanksgiving

“I’m going to do you a favor, Ranger.”

The words of the Bravo Company 1SG in Mountain Phase of Ranger school hit me like a ton of bricks.  His “favor” was letting me re-do mountain phase to clear out the plethora of major minuses I had accrued in the three weeks prior.  Let’s face it, the moment I acquired my 4th major minus two days into the first field exercise, I knew I was going to recycle the phase.  I spent the next 15 days trying unsuccessfully to earn a major plus (my only hope to salvage my performance); it didn’t happen.

Somehow word of my demise had reached the boys coming to join us from Darby and my best friend Chad Shields flew off the bus with a smile calling out my name.  I was devastated when he recycled Darby, he was elated to find out about my failure.  I sat on his bunk for a few minutes laughing with him and vividly describing the pain that was to come:  the blueberry pancakes are awesome, the terrain is terrible, the RI’s are worse.  Chad shrugged it off, “eh, it could always be worse.”

We made it through most of the phase without incident, but as we stepped off to start our second field exercise, it began to rain…

It was November 2004 on the Appalachian trail and the rain did not quit.  We lived through Forrest Gump style “every kind of rain”.  At one point we came down from the mountain and were told to fall-in to formation.  I remember the rain was coming down violently and the Ranger Instructor (RI) was yelling some instructions that I couldn’t hear.  I leaned to my buddy and asked what we were being told.   “Change your socks.”  I laughed hard as I watched my boot fill with water and hail while i put on “fresh” socks.  Chad looked at me, “It could always be worse!”

The rain on it’s own wouldn’t have been that terrible, except that the temperature kept dropping.  It felt like it was just above freezing and soaking wet.  My body began to ache in places I didn’t even know I had.  My hands and feet went completely numb, and I could barely feel pressure.  It felt like my big toe was missing which actually made walking a bit tricky.  My hands swelled up and cracked open and the blood froze on my skin.  I had tons of frozen cuts and scratches.  We learned to work around the violent shivering as it was a sign that we weren’t hypothermic yet.  Chad smiled at me, “It could always be worse!”

Finally on the night before Thanksgiving, the rain stopped.

It was amazing.  I looked up at the clear night sky and let out a sigh of relief.  That would be very short lived though.  Once the rain clouds were gone, the cold really began to set in.  I could feel it crawling around my skin and penetrating my bones.  When I stretched out my arm, water would drip off my uniform onto my hands and it felt like little daggers, the only sensation coming from my hands was pain.  I looked around for my buddy.  Through his chattering moon-lit teeth, Chad forced a smile, “It could always be worse!”

I have never stared so expectantly at the horizon as I did that morning.  If my will would have had an effect, the sun would have risen hours earlier.  Instead I searched for the first ray of light that would bring at least some warmth as I reached the brink of giving up.

As the early morning light finally pierced the darkness and landed on me, I looked down to notice a sheen across my uniform that didn’t exist the day before.  I reached for my chest and the uniform began to crack.  That sheen was ice.  I stared down in disbelief and began to crack and sweep the ice off my body.  Then guys began to quit.

 

I smelled the new RI’s before I heard or saw them.

My nose picked up the scent of Pantene and Irish Spring coming from the base of the mountain.  It meant fresh instructors, and it also meant the “fuck-fuck” games were about to start.

The next hour is a blur.  Instructors were yelling, guys were quitting and dropping out; some had frostbite, some had frostnip, more yelling, it was pandemonium. We were ordered to start three warming fires and to change our uniforms and put on polypropylene and gortex. I was on a machine gun, so no warming fire for me.

As I began to undress I felt a wet drop on my face, then another, then another.  “You’ve got to be kidding me!  It’s way too fucking cold to be raining,” I yelled in the general direction of Chad’s position as I unbuckled my pants and dropped them to the ground.  I heard his distinct laugh and I looked up in a rage when I saw it.  I was right, it was too cold for rain…it was snowing.

So there I stood, completely naked in the snow wringing out my polypro when I made eye contact with Chad.  He was now in full on laughter and it was infectious. I wanted to be angry, I really did, but as I stood there hopping from one bare foot to the next dreading the thought of putting on this sopping wet clothes, I couldn’t help but join Chad in laughing at how ridiculous this whole thing was.  “It can always be worse?” I asked him.  “Oh no dude, it’s all downhill from here,” he bellowed with a deep and honest laugh.

I’m Thankful for…

I was excited to finally start our movement, and within the first hour my body heat had dried the uniform; I was thankful to get moving.  The sun somehow beamed through the near foot of snow and actually felt warm against my face; I was thankful for the sun.  As soon as the mission was over, we loaded up in trucks and started heading back to the base to get ready for our next phase; I was thankful it was over.  On the ride back I sat next to Chad, and together we laughed with the others that made it; I am thankful for my friend, nay, my brother.

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-LJF

 

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My day with Nick and Jack

I keep glancing down at my GPS as I pull into the neighborhood where RangerUP headquarters is located; the area is shady as fuck. I send Nick a message that I am here and when I look up from my phone a guy was coming out of the building to have a cigarette.  I step boldly out of my Prius and introduce myself. He shook my hand, “I’m Jack, nice to meet you.”  As he said that it clicked.  I look more closely and in his eyes I had the faint resemblance of a certain character from Range15.  “Wait, Jack Mandaville?  Like from the movie?”  My voice goes up at least an octave, but in my defense, the guy looks nothing like his film persona:

I tell him about the shady neighborhood, and Jack laughs it off.  “Yeah man, like the first week we were here some dude was straight up murdered at the gas station…like muuuuuuuuurrrrdered.”  He points his hand like a gun and pops off caps into the ground as he hangs on the word murdered, the smoke from his Marlboro red adds a nice touch.

A bright red suburban with “Rgr Up 6” plates pulls into the parking lot and I can recognize the face I’ve seen on many a youtube video in the driver seat.  Nick pulls in and starts to do a Chinese fire drill switching out car seats with another car in the parking lot.  As a father, I know this drill well and can appreciate the urgency when he walks up and introduces himself. “Hey I’m Nick.  Let’s get inside before he sees me,” referencing his little boy that is already missing daddy.

Inside it looks exactly what you would expect the warehouse to look like when you’ve outsourced a large percentage of your work.  Mostly bare shelves and a metric fuckload of shipping materials and differently sized priority mail boxes sit on every horizontal surface.  Adorning the walls are beautiful liquid metal decorations of flags, punisher skulls, and different army units.  These really are gorgeous, and I found my eyes lingering on the 82nd Airborne patch as we make our way to a corner in the warehouse where the offices are.

Nick is already on his phone answering emails and checking twitter while he talks to me about the day ahead. I can’t stop thinking about how nice it would be to come to work in gym shorts and a t-shirt noticing his outfit.  On my right is a large white board that covers the wall.  Written on it are all kinds of video ideas, some have checkmarks, most have names next to them assigning some sort of responsibility.  “I’m sorry we’re really short-handed today,” Nick starts as he drifts off back into his phone then continues without looking up, “I had to send everyone to Georgia to unfuck that mess…gimme a sec.”  Something he read caught his attention and he retreats into his office.

I’m left behind with Jack and Thom, their resident editor who I would later learn is a genius when it comes to film.  Sitting on the table, shoved under some boxes, is a poster-board with stick figures drawn on it.  I pick it up and laugh, “Yeah, I’m not an artist, but it’s funny.  That’s a shirt I designed.  Want one?”  Just like that, Jack Mandaville was offering me for free an original design.  I muttered through some words as I’m still awestruck, but really, as a guy that knows the cost of inventory, I’m very sensitive about accepting gifts from small businesses.

 

“I wanted to be creative.  Pursue my passion, do something I loved, and make a difference.”

 

The conversation moves a bit as Jack tells me he used to be in the oil industry and write for the duffelblog on the side. I ask why he left, “I wanted to be creative.  Pursue my passion, do something I loved, and make a difference.”  His words were so damn passionate, they hit me like a bat to the teeth.  Not only can I identify with that statement, but the way he delivered it makes me want to stand on my desk and call him O Captain My Captain.

I ask a couple follow ups and before I know it, I move chairs and am looking over his shoulder at the computer. He jumps from one shirt to the next, showing me the designs, artwork, and most importantly, the stories behind each and every shirt.  “We’re more than a T-Shirt company.  Our product descriptions aren’t shit like 50% cotton 50% polyester extra larg-nah, read this shit!”  He points to the screen and starts to read a couple sentences from an American Sparta shirt.  He is booming with pride and testosterone, then he clicks and we’re staring at war rabbit.  I laugh, he chuckles and says, “then there’s this.  People eat this shit up man.”  By the way readers, I love war rabbit.

Nick comes back out, as he would throughout the day, told us the plan, told us he was ready to film, glanced at his phone, and went back into his office.  “Just give me a minute,” his voice carried across the offices as Jack’s phone rang.

It’s amazing to see what happens to a man when he’s in love.  Jack is a hard and hilarious motherfucker with a USMC tattoo prominently on his forearm. I watch his face transform in real time just by glancing at the caller ID.  “Hey baby!” His voice comes out soft and sweet.  He is excited and tempered at the same time as he rises from behind his desk and steps outside.

“That’s his girlfriend if you can’t tell,” Nick said as he came back out. I talk to him about the interview that I want to do. As I tell him what questions I want to ask he looks intently at the ground thinking about what he would say.  When I was done, he nods, “I’m ready to do this now.  Want to do it now?”  I tell him I’m ready and we step into a back room where we interrupt Thom working in the dark by flipping the light on.  Nick explains what we were doing as he sends another email on his phone and Thom immediately got to work setting everything up.  Nick promises he will be right back and shoots out towards his office.  I could tell things weren’t going well, but he wanted me to feel welcomed and he was going to find a way to be in more than one place at once.

Nick comes back in, asks if we’re ready and takes a seat in front of the camera.  He puts down his phone, shakes his head furiously, smacks his face, and his eyes meet mine and in an instant I see the key to his success.  In this moment, at this time, there is nothing else going on in Nick’s life but this interview.  There is no doubt he is wholly focused 100% on me, and let’s face it, I’m a fucking nobody.  Knowing that he is giving this much attention to something that in the grand scheme of his business isn’t going to make a great bit of difference is evidence of the focus, character, and effort he puts into a market that he revolutionized.

 

 “I had to get better.  I didn’t have a choice.  I had to be a better businessman, better entrepreneur, a better dad.”

 

I look down at my phone where I had my notes, ask my first question and immediately I’m sucked into his story.  “I learned I was getting another promotion in my corporate role…” He starts to recount the story of when he decided to quit his cushy job and work on RangerUP full time.  It cost him his marriage, he had to downgrade his house, ended up with tens of thousands of dollars in credit card debt, and had less than $1500 to his name.  “I had to get better.  I didn’t have a choice.  I had to be a better businessman, better entrepreneur, a better dad.”

There is no question that Nick got better.  He filled a market niche that no one else had up until that point and defined the market.  He created a business that not only grew in the new market, but has managed to stay on top while the competition increased in number and quality.  He even invented a marketing strategy that few have been able to replicate, and although it hasn’t made it into your MBA books yet, believe that it will one day.

Note: The interview is getting its own post with video in a few days, so make sure to like/follow/subscribe whatever, so you don’t miss it

Our interview ends and we bullshit for a few more minutes as Nick goes back to his phone.  Thom and I are left behind to discuss video file transfers as Jack comes back in the room.  He’s pacing a bit and throwing out ideas for the next movie.  “Should I wear a Hitler mustache?  Is that too much,” he asks us. We join in tossing out ideas on how to make his character over the top.  He stops pacing for a moment, “Actually no, because then i’d have to wear the mustache to dinner and shit.”

He’s hops over to a rack of costumes and starts pulling out items for a video that they are making today.  I look up to a large flatscreen in front of me that has Thom’s screen displayed.  On it I can read the script and immediately start laughing.  I look over at Jack, “Did you write this?”  “Yeah,” he answers pulling out a fake beard from the box at his feet.  He gets all the costumes ready and disappears.

About 30 minutes later Nick shows back up chomping on a burrito as Jack rounds the corner and tosses a burrito in my direction.  We eat quickly then Nick starts getting into his hipster outfit for the video.  He stands in front of a green screen facing the camera, Jack is sitting on the ground holding the script and reads the first line to Nick.  One take, nailed it, and we all laugh hard.  A quick costume change and Nick is ready to go again.  “If either of them are elected, you can stay in your own darn country,” Jack reads out and Nick repeats.  His Canadian accent is terrible and quickly morphs into Scottish at every turn.  I’m laughing so hard tears are rolling down my cheeks, Thom is laughing hard too, but Jack is just sitting there repeating the same line again and again in a perfect Canadian accent for Nick to emulate. Eventually they get a good take (see the video here), I ask for a photo with the two of them and say goodbye.

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On my way out we chat briefly about collaborating on a future video, I thank them again, and leave.  I get in my car, text my wife to let her know i’m heading home and take one last look at the RangerUP marquee above the door to the building.   This will go down as one of the coolest things I’ve ever done, even if it was just Thursday for Nick and Jack.

-LJF

 

 

 

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Why I drive a Prius and Other Begrudgingly Smart Financial Choices

I haven’t had a car payment for almost five years and it has been awesome…except for the fact that my 2006 Honda CRV was getting a bit boorish to drive and I really wasn’t a fan of the armrest.  Those are pretty silly reasons to buy a new car, and every time I went car shopping, I came back to the same realization that I loved money more than I loved a new car.  Then in mid-August a teenager not paying attention slammed into the back of my CRV as I was waiting on someone making a left turn.  The car didn’t really have much damage, but the bill for repair was approaching the value of the car and it was declared totaled and I got an $8,000 check.

 

I like to take my time making big financial choices, so I was a bit disappointed that I had less than a week to decide on a car.  I had three options as I saw it:

  1. Buy a similar vehicle to the one I had and stay on the savings plan to purchase a newer car in the next few years
  2. Spring a few extra thousand dollars and get a slightly nicer used car
  3. Put the $8,000 towards a new car and take on a car payment

After spending a weekend with every used car salesman in a 20 mile radius, I ended up settling on option #1 and purchased a Prius with similar mileage and a similar year to the car I was already driving, except now I have more than doubled my gas mileage and will probably only fill up the tank once a month (I’ve spent $14 on gas since mid September).

So now my household has a Prius and a Minivan.  I’ve thought about putting a Ranger bumper sticker on my Prius, then supplementing that with a “my other car is a minivan” sticker, because that’s just the kind of guy I am.

Look, it’s not sexy, and not a “fun” car to drive, but it’s comfortable and it gets me to work every day.  It’s a reliable vehicle and it protects me financially, and as I have told you in the past, strong finances also protect your marriage.  So by making this choice, some of you “manly-men” might make fun of me, but the most important relationship in my life is protected, so insult away bitches.

Other Frustratingly Smart Choices

I recently took a promotion within my company, moved my family back to North Carolina, and drove 45 minutes one way for nearly a year because I had a rental property that I couldn’t sell.  I know many of you have gone through this same pain in the ass problem.  We moved my big ass five person family into a small 3 bedroom 1600 square foot house for months because it was the smart financial choice.  When we finally sold it, we upgraded some, but stayed well below 20% of my salary in the new home and cut my drive to 20 minutes.  We could have afforded much more house, but we both know this isn’t our final living place, and our ability to save money is more important.  It also gives us greater financial flexibility.

I only learned these lessons because I made the mistakes before.  Less than a decade ago I was living in a house far more expensive than I needed to be and I had a $500 a month car payment.  We lived almost paycheck to paycheck, and whenever I got an overtime check, we would spend that too.  It wasn’t until I had to take a pay cut that all our bad habits cost us.  We argued, she cried, the stress was terrible, and I had to get rid of my beautiful truck and buy the minivan then drive the CRV.

We made, and still make, sacrifices financially, but we don’t have any debt.  We stay on a strict budget that fits our needs that includes entertainment, and going out, and new clothes for everyone regularly.  We take vacations, and now we never feel like we don’t have money, and folks let me tell you that feeling is so much greater than the new car smell or a great big house you don’t know how you’re going to pay for.  Those things aren’t going to bring you joy like being able to buy your kids the present they’ve been wanting without batting an eye. We’ve also become much more generous givers able to donate significantly to charity.

Being debt free means to have complete ownership of all the money you earn, and sadly very few people have EVER felt that.

Imagine not owing anyone.  Imagine not having to pay credit cards, student loans, car loans, etc.  Imagine getting a check and not being a slave to anyone else.  I strongly recommend Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace University, you can scroll down and find a class near you.  In Proverbs it says “the borrower is slave to the lender”, becoming debt free is releasing your own shackles.

Having debt is like a constant weight that you have to carry around hanging off every single paycheck.  No matter how hard you work, or what promotion you take, it never feels like enough.  We live in a culture that thrives on materialism where status is given by your belongings…but it’s all fake.  Some things are worth more than a fancy car or a really big house, and being financially secure is one of them.

Set yourself free!

-LJF

 

 

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Why We Can’t Cure PTSD

What I am about to say is going to piss some people off.  I want you to know that nothing that follows is meant to diminish the very real struggle that some veterans are facing.  Unless we stop to talk about why we have a PTSD epidemic, we will never arrive at a solution.  The truth, however, doesn’t care about your feelings, so today we ruffle some feathers…

I am going to examine 3 main reasons why, despite the best efforts of seasoned psychological professionals, we are continuing to see a rise in PTSD cases and very few people are getting “cured”.

 

Reason #1 Life Stressors

Difficulties in the workplace or in your personal relationships can exacerbate the problems with PTSD.  Similar to the straw that broke the camel’s back analogy, there simply is only so much that the human mind can handle, and then it gives on everything.  Here at CONUS Battle Drills (CBD), we have talked at length about the challenges that veterans will face with their transition.  It is not an easy time, and you receive painfully little training on how to have a successful transition.  A week long course on transition when you’re two months out from ETS is NOT sufficient.

We believe the DOD’s transition process needs a massive overhaul.  Soldiers are getting guidance about the civilian world from a chain of command of people that have never been in it, and dangerously little of it is accurate.  This is the easiest problem to fix and the stop-gap that we are trying to fill here at CBD by training you how to transition. We seek to give you the tools necessary for personal success in corporate life, marriage, and parenthood and thus remove added stress in your life.  If we can help you get the majority of your shit together, then you can focus on wrestling your demons.

Reason #2 Feeling of Community

This one may come as a bit of a surprise, but for many veterans it is their trauma that connects them to their lost brothers.  Although it can be torturous to re-live an experience in a traumatic way, the thought of losing that connection acts as a barrier to healing.  Whether they feel like they would be losing their friends for a second time, or maybe they feel guilty for being alive, their PTSD represents their service and brings them closer to their brothers.

Our providers need to be aware that some patients may not want to lose their PTSD because of this and deal with that accordingly.  Sometimes this doesn’t manifest itself in any obvious way, but as a provider you need to pay attention to see if this is an inhibition to healing for your patient.

Reason #3 Financial Incentive

This is the hardest problem to fix, and really what I think has spawned the rise in PTSD claims since the GWOT began.

Some guys are out there getting 100% disability for their PTSD, if they get cured, that means taking a hit of thousands of dollars in their disability rating.  Basically, our government is paying these guys to stay sick, and if they’re not sick, to at least claim that they still are or lose thousands of dollars a month!  When you have such a powerful motivation to not get well, it should come as no surprise that they don’t, or even that other guys get sick too.

This leaves us with a choice:  Continue to pay guys even after they are healed or don’t pay disability for PTSD.  Neither is a great option, but unless something is done about this financial incentive, we will never cure PTSD and the rates will continue to go up.

-Spartan

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